Give Her a Pattern

(originally posted 7/13/09)

In celebration of our country’s indepence, the Naked Girls theme was ‘Freedom of Choice’. I chose to read a story by D.H. Lawrence called Give Her a Pattern.  I found it in a photography book called Divas and Lovers by a husband and wife team called Studio Manasse.  When I found this story about a year ago, I was so excited because I felt that it said all the things I was thinking.  At the time I found this, I was observing a lot of women playing ‘characters’ to attract the opposite sex.  They weren’t being true to themselves and I found it so tiring.  I also recognized that I had done this in my past, and the scary thing was that I was really good at it!  I do consider it part of my job to help women find their true selves in order to not depict these ‘characters’ and I hope that I can achieve this.  After reading this story, I was asked by an audience member, ‘When do you think women find their true selves?’  I said, that sadly, not all women do, but it is my hope that what we are doing will help. Here are some excerpts from the story: The real trouble about women is that they must always go on trying to adapt themselves to men’s theories of women, as they always have done.  When a woman is thoroughly herself, she is being what her type of man wants her to be.  When a woman is hysterical it’s because she doesn’t quite know what to be, which pattern to follow, which man’s picture of woman to live up to. The women aren’t fools, but they must live up to some pattern or other.  They know men are fools.  They don’t really respect the pattern.  Yet a pattern they must have, or they can’t exist. Women are not fools.   They have their own logic, even if it’s not the masculine sort.  Women have the logic of emotion, men have the logic of reason.  The two are complementary and mostly in opposition.  But the woman’s logic of emotion is no less real and inexorable than the man’s logic of reason.  It only works differently. If they [men] want anything from women, let them give women a decent, satisfying idea of womanhood – not these trick patterns of washed-out idiots. ———————————– Now, let me say that I am not man bashing.  I love them and respect them.  I found this piece to be exciting because I was feeling disappointed in women because I observed them doing this and I recognized it in myself.  I think men and women share the responsibility in this ‘pattern making’ and it is good to recognize that it exists.  All I want is for women to know that this doesn’t have to continue and we can make our own patterns that all will respect.

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~ by ngrblogadmin on January 11, 2010.

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