Play It F%*#ING Loud!!

•May 19, 2011 • Leave a Comment

  Naked.  Rock & Roll.  Magnificence.

Seriously.  Everything about our second annual Naked Girls Rock was incredible!!!  From the readings to the photo shoot to the ever-popular Naked Guitar Hero ChallengeBut lets rewind a second here…the photo shoot.  Holy fucking photo shoot!!  It was some of the most fun I’ve EVER had on a shoot and…um…the images?  Yeah.  Amazing.  (psst – check out Michelle’s blog for our pic as Gina Simmons and Paula Stanley!)

Of the readings I did this year, I had so much fun with my segments on Tom Waits and Johnny Cash.  The piece I did on Johnny cash was taken from his autobiography.  I read about the time he was attacked by an ostrich.   It was actually a pretty brutal attack that had him hospitalized.  Yes…I said ostrich.  I have seen, with my own two eyes, an ostrich attack someone before – it’s insane!!  It is truly bizarre to witness something like that.  When I read this, I could literally picture Johnny Cash being attacked!!  Naturally, I had to bring it to this event.

But what really made my night, was reading a Tom Waits interview with Dominique Trixx.  First of all, if you’ve never attended a Chicago Naked Girls event, I’ll let you in on a little secret…Dominique Trixx & I have a ridiculously amusing time role-playing with each other and we try to do it quite often.  The interview was fantastic and involved much, much laughter.  In addition to the interview, I read a wonderful quote by Waits which I’d like to share once again:

“My kids are starting to notice I’m a little different from the other dads. “Why don’t you have a straight job like everyone else?” they asked me the other day. I told them this story: In the forest, there was a crooked tree and a straight tree. Every day, the straight tree would say to the crooked tree, “Look at me…I’m tall, and I’m straight, and I’m handsome. Look at you…you’re all crooked and bent over. No one wants to look at you.” And they grew up in that forest together. And then one day the loggers came, and they saw the crooked tree and the straight tree, and they said, “Just cut the straight trees and leave the rest.” So the loggers turned all the straight trees into lumber and toothpicks and paper. And the crooked tree is still there, growing stronger and stranger every day.”  

Keep rocking, beautiful stranger.

~Greta Layne


The Man Behind the Mask

•May 18, 2011 • Leave a Comment

For our 3rd annual Naked Girls ROCK edition, the girls and I decided to ‘dress’ as KISS.  That really means being naked with KISS make up on and some great boots.  Here’s a picture of me (Gina Simmons) and Greta Layne (Paula Stanley):

This was one of the craziest photo shoots I have ever done.  I didn’t realize how awesome it would be to have that make up on and be naked.  Quite a thrill.  Really, if could be Gene Simmons every day, I probably would.  There’s a lot of power in that make up.  I could have a delightful disposition, but with that make up on, I look intimidating.  People suddenly backed away from me…got a little scared.  It was great!!!  I gained a great appreciation for the man behind the mask, Mr. Gene Simmons.  Say what you want about the man, but this make up was the best idea he’s ever had.  I also gained an appreciation for his tongue!  Playing the part, I was sticking my tongue out as much as possible and I was sore the next day!  I expose lots of things, but not usually my tongue.

I never really understood the appeal of the mask.  I’ve worn them before, but they didn’t have a thrill for me.  I like being myself and I don’t have an interest in being someone else, unless that someone else is Gene Simmons! I wanna rock ‘n’ roll all night, and read books all day!

Stay tuned for the NAKED KISS tribute band!

Where No Man Has Gone Before

•April 11, 2011 • 1 Comment

I have to admit that finding material for the SciFi event was a daunting task for me.  I wasn’t too familiar with the subject and I had preconceived thoughts about what SciFi meant.  I just thought it was about aliens and rocket ships.  I had no idea that so much philosophy was involved in SciFi.  Some of the concepts that are dealt with in this misunderstood genre were mind blowing.  For example, I read ‘The Man Born Blind’ by CS Lewis.  In this story, a man gets eye surgery and can see for the first time.  He was talking to his wife and asked the simple question, ‘What is light?’  She tried to explain it, but nothing makes him understand what light is.  We ‘see’ it everyday but how do you explain this concept to someone who has never seen the light?  His wife points to a light bulb and says, ‘That is light.’  This is confusing to him because at first, she said that light is all around us. So why then, is light dwindled down to 2 wires in a bulb? Is that light?  He continues his search for light and one day he visits a quarry.  There is a painter who is trying to capture the scene.  Our man born blind asks the painter what he is doing.  The painter then says, ‘I’m capturing the light.  This is the only time where you can see the light.’  How interesting that a painter is also on a quest for light and has a mission to interpret the light.  The man born blind is relieved and fascinated and reaches out to touch the light and ends up falling to his death and the bottom of the quarry.  A tragic story.

Ever since reading this, I have tried to come up with an answer of how to explain light.  I don’t yet have a way to describe light, but maybe this is something you can think about and can share with me.

Truth is a Matter of the Imagination

•April 10, 2011 • Leave a Comment

The month of April brought SciFi to the Chicago Naked Girls…finally.  If you had seen the posters or were there, I’m sure you heard the catchy little phrase “Going where no man has gone before”, in reference to the event.  Well, I’d like to take the time now to rephrase that.  I would like to refer to the evening as “Going where Greta has never gone before”.  You may laugh or think I’m trying to be cheeky, but the truth is, I really hadn’t been there before…ever.

I want to share with you why I was petrified of this theme.  Are you sitting down as you read this?  No, seriously, are you?  I’m about to make a confession.  I had never before in my life picked up a science fiction book.  But wait, that’s not all.  I’ve actually never even seen Star Trek, Star Wars, or any other sci fi movie.  That fact somehow manages to shock nearly everyone that hears it.  What can I say?  That’s just me.  I wasn’t really exposed to the material growing up, never took interest in it as I got older, and it is now like a foreign language to me that I had never needed to learn nor had ever been pressured into learning.  Naturally, when I realized that this was the theme for April, I began having heart palpitations.

Being that this a genre that fans take very seriously, I really wanted to do it justice.  But how was I to know which works were considered good in comparison to which authors were looked down upon?  I have never researched so much for a Naked Girls event as I did this one. While combing through books and scouring the internet, I learned a great deal.  Many of the typical stereotypes about this genre that my beliefs had fallen victim to were obliterated.  I also realized that many books that I had read and loved, such as A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess or Frankenstein by Mary Shelley are actually considered to be sci fi works…imagine my surprise!

Considering that the anticipation of this event made me tremble in my stilettos, it might amaze you to know that this was one of my favorite Naked Girl events.  Why?  The answer is eminently simple.  Being in a venue that packed with individuals that are so passionate about the literature being read and discussed is beyond incredible.  The energy in the room that night was palpable.

While I’m not going to take the time right now to review all of the works I had chosen, I will leave you with a few of my favorite quotes that I read that evening from Stranger in a Strange Land by Robert A. Heinlein:

“There is no safety this side of the grave”

“I’ve found out why people laugh. They laugh because it hurts so much . . . because it’s the only thing that’ll make it stop hurting.”

“Consider the black widow spider. It’s a timid little beastie, useful and, for my taste, the prettiest of the arachnids, with its shiny, patent-leather finish and its red hourglass trademark. But the poor thing has the fatal misfortune of possessing enormously too much power for its size. So everybody kills it on sight.”

“Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition. The immature mind often mistakes one for the other, or assumes that the greater the love, the greater the jealousy – in fact, they are almost incompatible; one emotion hardly leaves room for the other.”

~Greta Layne

Sci-Fi, Finally!

•April 9, 2011 • Leave a Comment

I’ve been hoping we’d get to do this underrated and under-appreciated genre for a while now. Loving the wonderful philosophical forward thinking genre that is Sci-Fi doesn’t make me a nerd rather I think it makes me a humanist. I’d like to attest that this genre is rich in emotion and not a lackluster sound off of imaginary names and races with little or no bearing to real experiences.

Reading about robots could reveal more about humanity than you’d think. For example, Isaac Asimov’s I robot has in it many stories that deal with a set of theoretical ethics which humanity puts into place inside the coding of every artificial intelligence constructed. This set of rules are Asimov’s rules of robotics and they are as follows:

  1. A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.
  2. A robot must obey orders given it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
  3. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.

In 2011, with robots dropping bombs, allowing people in wheelchairs to walk, crashing the stock market, and performing stand-up comedy, it’s good to re-examine the ethical and practical concerns as we integrate more and more machines into our lives and automate more and more of our society’s day-to-day functions, as well as our own humanity.  At least until the singularity comes, it’s important to think about the ways we implement technology into our lives, instead of just blindly moving towards more convenience.

-Mimi First


•April 6, 2011 • Leave a Comment

I am a proud owner of Stick-On Glow in the Dark Planets, I am a planetarium member, and I am sometimes seen hanging out in observatories —   I love looking at binaries and “double doubles”, and as for planets —  Saturn’s rings and moons are my fetish.   Looking through an incredible telescope in an old observatory is a quiet and eerie and moving experience.  (and to think Saturn has  53 moons —   Titan included!)    Send a comment if you need to look any of these up, and we’ll talk.

..Anyway, Space and the final frontier and all that. April’s Sci Fi theme was replete with Darth Vader’s theme song upon each of our entries,  a friendly (?)  Star Trek themed debate (courtesy of Mimi First) , and some moments that would be hard to describe except to say C.S. Lewis has some material that is absolutely unforgettable, and Michelle L’amour bravely and beautifully read a passage that was incredible.

I think one of the best things about Science Fiction is (a) the fans and (b) the dazzle.   Dazzle as in wonder, awe, debate, the opening of ideas,  the asking of questions,  knowing there are no answers, — Science and philosophy and all out wonder is a huge part of what I love about reading Science Fiction. I love 1950’s Sci-Fi, both images and books, (and movies!!)  -1954’s” Them!” being one of my many faves-    For our blissfully sold-out reading,  I chose James Blish’s  (not a pun)  novel called  Year 2018!  (Published in England as “They Shall Have Stars”) — The reference ” Millions Now Living Will Never Die” is in this book, and it has everything from drug companies clandestinely manufacturing anti-aging/anti-death drugs complete with behind -closed- doors infant vivisections, to a bridge being built on Jupitor. It is a true hard sci fi romp, and 2018 sure looked like the future in 1957 when this book was published.   It has a great X- Files- esque McCarthy-era/ brandy-snifter swirling /smoking-man type scene which starts off the book. I chose to read this as I am a huge fan of brandy snifting. (is that a verb?) –   A – male-  freshman senator from Alaska (!) and an ex-Director of  the World Health Organization meet and discuss space flight programs and government frustration in this scene.  All while passing the brandy and sitting in an office with a fire in the fireplace casting shadows on the walls.  James Blish was a true scientist and even worked for a drug company for a while, the name of which is loosely veiled in this book. Blish also wrote Titan’s Daughter, by the way. Hope you like the graphic.– It is thought that Blish coined the word Gas Giant. (My Saturn references continue).

I also read from the 1950’s series “Tom Swift Jr. Adventures”, which covers the adventures of one Tom Swift, sometimes with his friend Bud, with fabulous illustrations by Graham Kaye and written by Victor Appleton II. I read from Tom Swift and His Giant Robot, (1954),  but Tom has adventures related to his…Flying Lab (Tom Swift And His Flying Lab), his Jetmarine (Tom Swift and His Jetmarine) , his rocket ship, his Atomic Earth Blaster, his Outpost in Space, Diving Seacopter, Ultrasonic Cyclopane….oh, it is great. Triphibian Atomicar, anyone? How bout a Electronic Retroscope or a Spectromarine Selector?

On the other side of the Sci Fi style, I opted to read Ursula K. LeGuin. The Left Hand Of Darkness is moving, and fantastic, and thought provoking, and I really loved reading it. She’s won more Sci-Fi writing awards (Nebula/Hugo) than many of her male counterparts, such as Isaac Asimov and Neil Gaiman. Not that I’m counting. But I did count how many men vs women seemed to be in the genre and felt it was pretty damn important to read LeGuin. Thanks for my vocal supporters in our audience!

Can’t wait to hear your comments about our Journeys to the Center of the Earth and everything interplanetary and intraplanetary.

–Dominique Trixx

Top Ten Naked Girls Reading Moments

•March 15, 2011 • Leave a Comment

Along with celebrating the many authors and works from New Orleans, we also celebrated our 2 year anniversary this month!  Looking back over the 2 years, I’ve come to realize that we have done some crazy things and I’m going to narrow it down to my favorite top 10 Naked Girls Reading Moments.

10. Naked Girls Reading Pirate Month – We all dressed as pirates and read at a steering wheel.  The event was complete with a parrot.

9. Naked Girls Go to the Movies – We read in director’s chairs, passed out popcorn and I re-enacted Christian Bale’s meltdown on the set of Terminator.

8. The Literary Honors Awards – This was the first year of this writing contest and the winner happened to be from Chicago, even though we received entries from all over the world.  It was an honor to award Patty Templeton the first Literary Honors Award at our brand new venue, The Everleigh Social Club.

7. The Cops – Naked Girls Reading has become quite popular with the Chicago cops.  They pop in every once in a while to make sure everything is on the up and up.  Pun intended.

6. Kermit the Frog Here – For our Vampire theme, I found a Sesame Street story involving the Count and Kermit the Frog as a news reporter.  It turns out that I’ve been working up to this moment all my life…doing a Kermit the Frog impression while naked.

5. The Cake Topper – Receiving the cake topper from TJ Rappel for our 2 year anniversary was a special day. He went above and beyond the call of duty and the topper is now displayed proudly at the Everleigh Social Club.

4. Movie Butt – Projecting movies on girls’ butts is quite entertaining.  This year, for Christmas Carol, we projected Frosty the Snowman on the booties of Dominique Trixx and Greta Layne.

3. 3D Paper dolls – Yes. First of all, paper dolls for Naked Girls Reading is a ridiculous idea.  The idea is to change the book that we’re holding, not dress us up, although there are accessories that you can put on the girls.  And secondly, if you touch the paper dolls in the right places, some areas are raised.  Very wrong and so right.

2. Zorro – I was Zorro this year for Naked Ghouls Reading.  I had the cape and the hat and the boots.  The best part, of course, was the letter ‘Z’ shaved into my bits.  Well…I had to put it somewhere!

And the number 1 Naked Girls Reading Moment is…

1. Celebrating our 2 year anniversary with founding members Mimi First, Greta Layne and Dominique Trixx while wearing Mardi Gras masks and dancing to the New Orleans sounds of The Fat Babies.  We also got a nice surprise from Jeff Millies, our resident photographer.  He put together a photo slide show of our Naked history.  So touching!  We will do a Naked Girls Reading book one day.  I promise!

I’m telling you, this was a hard list to put together.  The opinions expressed in this countdown are my own and do not reflect the opinions of the other naked girls!